


Weak Knees

by noero



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Bottom Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Canon Universe, Future Fic, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-09 02:53:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5522723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noero/pseuds/noero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi still suffers chronic pain from the injury he sustained on the Fifty-Seventh Expedition even though he hides it well.  He’s left both humiliated and frightened when the pain causes him to slip up during a training exercise.  Rattled by the incident, he asks Eren to keep it between them and the shared secrecy reveals an unexpected intimacy in their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Weak Knees

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sciencefictioness](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sciencefictioness/gifts).



> My Secret Santa gift for Sciencefictioness! I went with “one of the boys caring for the other” because I am weak to hurt/comfort prompts. 
> 
> This is a hot mess ngl. I'm very sorry for any and all errors (or just flat out sloppy writing). I panicked two days ago when I did a 'final' read through and deleted two-thirds of the fic because I wasn't 100% satisfied with it. Not my best decision. I will come back to fix all the incomplete thoughts at some point but I wanted it to be on time. I hope it's still enjoyable!

Pain is no obstacle. Levi prides himself on his ability to fight through sheer will. He’s had enough close calls to admit he’s human but he’s also earned his place near the top of the food chain. He is willing to die, but only if it means something. There are no alternatives.

Being rendered helpless only reminds Levi of dirty, sticky floors beneath his bare feet and the stench of death wrapped around him. He’s no longer a penniless orphan digging meals out of trashcans but joining the Legion didn't exactly stifle his need to survive. Levi is and always was a survivor.

And a survivor is not someone who can afford stupid mistakes.

He’s dislocated a shoulder, broken fingers and toes, fractured his ribs more times than he can count. Never once has he let any of it prevent him from doing what he needs to do. 

To fall flat on his ass in the middle of a training exercise - for no reason other than his own stubborn resolve - makes him feel like both an idiot and a failure. 

Erwin warned him two years prior when he caught Levi’s limp in the mess hall, despite how well Levi hid it and had done so for years. There were physical therapists in Sina that worked wonders, he claimed, and enough discretionary funds to cover whatever treatment Levi needed. 

His words were sincere but it wasn’t an order. If had been, Levi reasons he wouldn’t be in this predicament now. 

But Levi winced at Erwin's concerned sulking and rejected the offer, seeing it as ridiculous and a waste of both Legion funds and his own valuable time. Their priorities were to focus on killing titans and the growing demand for resources in Maria’s territory, not to throw money at a glorified masseuse meant to pamper all the dimwits in the Military Police. 

So Levi refused to take the generous leave of absence, even while winter halted expeditions, just for some stiff muscles and aching bones. Levi was not a feeble-bodied old man and refused to act like one.

He assured Erwin there was nothing to worry about.

Only when he lied prone in a pile of putrid, rotting leaves with an agonizing pain shooting through his leg, he regrets all his previous refusals. If he’d not been so focused on denying his own discomfort, he may have realized the old injury was a growing problem and that perhaps if even a hard-ass like Erwin thought treatment necessary then maybe - just maybe - he should have listened. 

He’d gone out that morning intending to teach Eren a more efficient method for anchoring his wire straight off horseback. He instead demonstrated a spectacular way to be thrown from his horse after his bad leg failed him.

They were thankfully a mile away from the main training ground so he managed the blunder without the prying eyes of a hundred new recruits. He may have even shrugged it off it not for Eren, who was dutifully three steps behind him when he fell. 

Levi feels like a proper fool.

Eren has always been a good kid, making up for whatever he lacks in raw talent with a steadfast devotion to any task he’s given. He’s oblivious to the obvious but painfully intuitive about visceral concepts. There is little doubt in Levi’s mind that Eren knows what was going through Levi’s mind that afternoon. He ran to Levi as soon as he hit the ground, and Levi was stupidly stunned for a minute, unable to pull air into his parched lungs. The squeeze of Eren’s hand on his shoulder mirrored the pinch of the brows. 

The hard truth is that Levi was scared. Surviving has always been a battle of mind over matter for him, but faced with the reality that his body may not always cooperate was terrifying. 

And Eren knew.

Levi brushed him off and hurried back to his own private quarters as soon as Eren backed up enough to let him stand, no shortage of muttered curses slipping off his tongue. Eren had looked lost - insulted even - at Levi’s curt dismissal (though by all accounts he should be used to it). 

For his part, Levi used the free afternoon to distance himself from everyone else. He’d hoped maybe Eren would find something to distract him and leave him in peace.

No such luck. 

When someone raps on his door just after sundown, he doesn’t have to ask who it is. He briefly considers turning Eren away but experience has taught him that deterring Eren will only make him press harder. He's no desire to drag this debacle into the following days.

He downs the last of his tea before asking him in. Eren opens his mouth to greet Levi, but stops in the doorway with a frown.

It takes Levi a minute to remember how disheveled he must look. He'd showered and thrown back on only half his uniform with the intent to hide out in his office all day. His hair was mussed, sleeves rolled up, and cravat sloppily strewn over his shoulders. 

There's a tug in his chest that Eren looks minutely disappointed, but Levi chooses not to think about too much.

“Hey." Eren steps in and pulls the door shut behind him. "Is this a bad time? You look… busy.”

“I’m off duty.” He flicks his gaze back to the paperwork in front of him. If Eren wants to act overly casual, Levi won't play nice. “It’s past curfew, by the way.”

“Yeah,” He offers a crooked grin and shifts his focus to the floor. “Can… Can I talk to you about what happened earlier today?”

Levi clicks his tongue and tosses his pen down. “I told you to take rest of the day off. Whatever you need from me, I’m sure it can wait until tomorrow.”

“I wanted -” he stops himself, looking away again. For a few moments, he shuffles where he stands and Levi spots a suspicious paper bag in his left hand. “I didn’t see you in the mess hall this evening. I was going to talk to you then. I was a little worried.”

“You didn’t need to be.” Levi takes it as his cue to resume his work, waving Eren off. “We'll pick up where we left off in the morning so there's no need to dwell on it. If you don’t have anything else useful to say to me, get out.”

“Um, Sir…” Eren takes an audible breath and Levi tenses at the reinsertion of his title. “Captain. It may not be my place to say this. But if that happened during an expedition-”

“You’re right,” Levi snaps, boiling over at Eren’s rigid persistence. “It’s not your place. And I’ll remind you that it didn’t happen in the field.” He has a half a mind to drag Eren out of the room by his teeth. Sina herself _knows_ Eren is right, but instinct and lingering pride keeps Levi from admitting that out loud. 

Eren doesn't leave. He takes three more steps toward Levi’s desk, holding out the paper bag. “Major Hange gave this to me... to give to you.”

“I specifically _told you_ not to say anything to Hange or Erwin.” 

“I didn’t.” Eren sounds flippant and the tone is unexpected enough that it grabs Levi’s attention. “The people who care about you can tell when you’re hurt.”

Levi grits his teeth. He hadn't actually thought Eren said anything to either of them, but the condescending edge to his voice makes Levi's skin crawl. Somehow, after becoming an adult, Eren has become even more of a brat. 

It's no longer cute.

“Fine. Thank them for me. You’re dismissed.”

“I didn’t just come here to drop it off," Eren adds. He pulls out a glass vial and lays it on Levi's desk. He hesitates for the first the that evening. "Since I heard you refused to see a doctor, I, um... volunteered my services?”

Levi gives him a flat look and cringes inside. He has the sudden impression he’s somehow been duped. He thinks Hange and Erwin must be in on it. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“Right.” Eren looks down again. “My father was a doctor. He treated a lot of farmers and they do really hard work in the field. I know it’s not exactly like fighting titans. But they had a lot of chronic pain, kind of like what you have. I think. And, well, there are some treatments I know that might help. It’s like a massage.” He pauses and bites his lip. Levi can’t decide if he’s just nervous or outright scared, but the expression looks absurd on his face. “If you’ll let me try. Sir.”

Levi taps his fingers impatiently on his desk, but considers the offer. He doubts Eren has even the slightest clue what he’s doing but if he can avoid a stuffy office in Sina with a stranger touching him, then maybe it’s not a bad deal. He doubts Erwin will accept no for an answer this time around. 

“So, you’re telling me you learned all this as a kid and now you think you’re an expert?”

“Well, no. I’m not an expert. Actually, I didn’t pay much attention. Back then. But Mikasa picks this stuff real fast and she was really good even though she only lived with us for a year.” He looks at his hands, seeming to realize he’s rambling. “She’d do it for Armin and me when we were in training. It helps a lot. I promise.” 

Eren definitely doesn't know what he's doing. 

But if nothing else, Levi is curious. He waits - unable to resist teasing him, just a bit - before nodding and scooting his chair back. His mouth twitches as Eren's eyes widen. Of course he'd offer something without considering the possibility that Levi might say yes.

“If you spill anything, you’re on stable duty for a month.” Eren is still gaping at him as he rolls up both pant legs and leans back expectantly. "If you're gonna bother me, you can at least see that you do a thorough job."

Eren jolts himself back to attention and offers an impish smile as he kneels down in front of Levi’s chair. “I’ll be careful.”

Their positions manage to quickly tilt the scales back in Eren's favor. When he touches Levi's skin, his hands are warm. Too warm. 

Levi tenses on instinct and Eren slows until he relaxes. Experience had aged Eren to the point he knows when to stop pushing boundaries. He's still an impatient hothead, even at twenty years old, but he's matured enough to keep his impulses in check when it matters.

The fact that he's always nurtured some ridiculous crush on Levi has never been a secret. It was obvious back when he first arrived at the castle. Oluo, Erd, and Gunther had teased him for it relentlessly. 

Dealing with misplaced hero-worship isn't exactly new territory for Levi, but there was always something disturbing about Eren. By all accounts, Eren should have resented Levi after that day in court. To not only hold no reservation with Levi, but to feel affection for him was unnerving. 

Levi didn't want it. He didn't deserve it.

Now, he has to remind himself that Eren isn't a child anymore and that reality makes things difficult. His broad shoulders, angular cheeks, and freshly shaved face haven't gone unnoticed.

It's even harder to ignore with Eren's hands on him, moving up his calves slowly and digging into the tired muscles. Whatever ridiculous concoction he’s using (a gift from Hange, Levi’s sure) makes his skin tingle and feel numb at the same time. He'll admit it is therapeutic, but the careful way Eren's fingers dig into him his uncomfortably sensual.

He's not caught Eren looking at him in a long time, not the way he did when he was younger, and it provides a different kind of thrill. Not knowing if Eren wants him any longer makes Levi want to find out. He's always liked solving problems.

He'll worry about the consequences later. He'll worry about how his body might fail him - _will fail him_ \- when that day comes.

He can't.

"Does it bother you?"

Eren stops and looks up at him, confused. "What?"

Levi swallows. "That an old man is supposed to protect you?"

Eren's brow pinches and he frowns, hands digging deeper into Levi's muscles. "You're more than capable, sir. You just need to take better care of yourself."

Levi hums and holds his tongue. There is never time for that.

"I can do this," Eren continues, focused back on his task. "Every night if you need it. I don't mind."

After he says it, his fingers creep just under the folded hem of Levi's pants. There are several other things Levi imagines he'd like Eren to do for him every night.

“Wouldn’t that be easier if you just took them off?” 

There's an uncomfortable beat of silence and Eren gives an awkward chuckle, refusing to meet Levi’s gaze. “No. I mean… unless it's more comfortable for you?”

Levi doesn't say anything else and Eren moves upward to knead the area just above his knee. “Up here too, sir?” 

“Yeah,” he drawls, letting his knees fall farther apart. “What you're doing, it feels good.”

"How far do you want me to go?"

Levi swallows, ruminating over his next words carefully. Trusting his own judgement has always been a necessity when the situation calls for it but Levi knows better than to ignore regulations that exist for a reason. For each rule he’s flat-out ignored since joining the Legion, there are a hundred more he refuses to even bend. 

Figuring out where fucking one of his subordinates lands on that scale has become murky, even if he knows the answer should be obvious. 

Levi could play it off, pretend it was a joke. He and Eren have a strange history even when his moral obligations aren't thrown into the mix. He'd thought his relationship with Erwin and Hange was the only type of intimacy he needed, but what he felt for Eren didn't match up.

His biggest fear is not that he'll lose Eren, but that he won't ever be able to give Eren everything he deserves. 

After everything he's lost in life, to ache for some reason other than losing what he loves fills him with trepidation.

Whatever has become of him, he's not gotten where he is without taking risks.

He’s tired.

He’s old.

He doesn't have much to give but he's prepared to give all of it.

“Touch me.”

Even stops and looks at him, expression almost cunning in a way. Neither of them speak for what feels like an eternity, the rhythmic sound of Levi's heart filling the silence. 

Then Eren grins, wordlessly hooking a finger under the waistband of Levi’s pants, pulling slightly.

Levi lifts his hips and Eren pulls down his pants, leaving him in his thin cotton boxers and nothing to hide how hard is already. Eren mercifully doesn’t comment, sliding his palms up Levi’s thighs and spreading his legs along the way. 

He kisses the sensitive skin of Levi's inner thigh, moving upward just an inch at a time. It’s agonizing how slow he moves, spreading Levi’s legs as he goes. 

"You're more than capable, sir," Eren murmurs against his leg. "You know that, right?"

Levi clicks his tongue, impatient and disbelieving. He's been treated like a celebrity almost as long as he's been in the Legion, but compliments have never meant much to him. It's hard to feel good about anything when you lead the life they do. 

As Eren works his way up to the hem of his underwear, Levi tangles a hand in his messy hair. "Is this what you wanted when you came tonight?"

Eren leans back on his knees and grants Levi a crooked grin. "Is this what _you_ were hoping for? _Captain_?"

Levi knows Eren is fucking with him but the low tone he uses sends a jolt straight to his groin. Levi rubs a thumb across Eren’s bottom lip before sliding two fingers into his mouth. He feels over the surface of Eren’s teeth and softly presses his tongue. Eren takes the hint, closing his mouth around Levi’s fingers and sucking lightly. With his other hand he palms himself through his boxers, enjoying the moan Eren emits watching him.

"Go down on me," he orders

Eren releases his fingers and swats Levi's hand away. "I've thought about this before," he whispers before pulling Levi's erection from the confines of his underwear. 

Levi scoffs at that only to swallow a groan when Eren takes him in his mouth. He plays with Eren’s hair, gently pulling and threading his fingers through the soft strands. He’s more than a little sloppy but just knowing it’s _Eren_ wrapped around him is thrilling in a way he’s not experienced before. 

Eren works him without reservation, without any hesitancy. He’s perfectly brazen. Bold. 

The noises coming from him are obscene. Eren is beautiful. Imperfect. 

“D-don’t move too fast,” Levi gasps. Eren obliges, slowing the roll of his tongue up and down, from the base back to the tip. His breath is unbearably hot against Levi’s moist skin and Levi does his best not to moan. “ _There_. Keep it up.”

Set on torturing Levi, Eren pulls off and lets his lips hover just over the tip, bring his tongue peeks out to just barely graze the skin. Levi pumps himself while his other hand continues to toy with Eren’s hair. 

“I’ve thought about this before, too,” Levi admits. He'd thought about long before he should have.

“Yeah?” Eren nuzzles the juncture of Levi’s thigh, letting his mouth brush against Levi’s knuckle as he moves. He begins to rub himself through his pants and Levi kicks the hand away.

"Stand up."

Eren obediently complies and Levi pulls him closer to stand directly between his knees. He tugs greedily at Eren’s harness, unclasping the belts impatiently before standing and maneuvering Eren toward his bed. 

Along the way, Eren manages to snake an arm around Levi’s midsection and pull him upward just enough that he can kiss Levi’s neck. He’s unreasonably gentle and soothing when Levi expects him to be rough and harsh. The sound that escapes Levi’s mouth in inexcusable.

Eren has the nerve to laugh, and Levi growls at him. Together, it’s a low and vibrant sound.

“For that,” Levi says, pushing him down onto the mattress. “You’re going to lay there and be good.”

“Yes, sir.” Eren doesn’t look admonished at all, joy filling his eyes.

Levi makes quick work undressing Eren. He doesn’t bother to remove the straps along Eren’s legs and only untucks Eren’s shirt, only pulling his pants and boxers down as far as the lower half of his harness will allow. 

Eren makes a strangled sound of anticipation, his cock twitching impatiently. He grips the bed sheets. “ _Please_ , sir.”

“Look at you,” Levi teases. “You came here to mess with me and now you can’t stand it.”

Levi strips off his own underwear and tosses his clothes aside. Feeling merciful, he grants Eren’s cock a quick squeeze before climbing up to straddle him.

“No touching.”

Eren whines but everything about his expression screams that he’s enjoying their game. Levi reaches into his nightstand and pulls out a bottle of his own oil, making a show of coating his fingers. 

“Pay close attention,” Levi adds with a smirk. 

Eren’s eyes are glued to him as he reaches back to finger himself, sliding a single finger in while rubbing his other hand up Eren’s stomach. His eyes drift shut on their own accord and Eren moans bneath him, bucking his hips up desperately. Levi stays just shy of him, occasionally moving his free hand to squeeze Eren’s balls.

“ _Good boy_.”

The desperate noises he makes are obscene and his eyes turn wild.

“Please, sir,” Eren pleads, letting his fingers brush just over Levi’s knees. “C-can I blow you again?”

Levi admonishes him, inserting another finger while contemplating his offer. The way Eren bites his lip in desperation makes Levi give in. He lets Eren pull his hips upward so he’s straddling his shoulders, one hand on the headboard. He tangles the other in Eren’s hair.

Eren takes him in his mouth again, hungrier than before. Levi lets out a shaky breath, “You actually enjoy this, don’t you?”

Eren gives a muffled reply, bringing his hands up to part Levi’s asscheeks. He slides his own finger in, wiggling around rougher than what Levi’s used to. He lets the transgression go, enjoying the combined effect of Erens’ tongue in conjunction with the movement.

He finds a proper rhythm quickly and Levi thrusts into his mouth. He’s fascinated by the tears gathering his lashes, the pink of his flushed face, and the drool seeping from the corner of his lips. 

“More,” he pants.

Eren gives a muffled affirmation, mouth still tight around his cock. He adds a second finger, moaning as he twists and Levi knows without looking that he’s touching himself. 

“ _More_ , Eren.” His voice sounds strange even to himself. His lungs are as shaky as his thighs, quivering under the strain of their positions. He’s probably undoing whatever good Eren’s “massage” might have offered, but he can’t bring himself to care.

Eren adds a third finger and Levi aches for Eren’s cock to be buried inside him instead. But he also can’t bring himself to abandon the wet heat of Eren’s mouth, making every effort to suck him dry. 

“ _Eren._ ”

It’s not meant to be an encouragement but Eren takes it as one, letting go of Levi’s cock only to push his hips upward and tongue the underside of his balls. Levi feels him jerk first, moaning beneath him and Levi presses his hips backward onto his fingers.

He follows behind immediately, mouth open and silent as he comes. 

Levi is vaguely aware he’ll have to wash his sheets before he can sleep but he lets Eren reposition him down on the bed for the time being.

“Do you feel better now?” Eren asks, innocent and calm.

Levi chuckles despite himself. He’s damned if he doesn’t feel twice as sore as he did earlier.

But they can start the cycle over. 

Every night, as Eren said.


End file.
